BIFF IS A GAME CHANGER FOR COMMUNICATING WITH PEOPLE WITH HIGH CONFLICT PERSONALITIES
We live in an age of rapid change and instant communication. We also live in a Culture of Blame and Disrespect, creating a need to manage our responses to high conflict people (HCPs). A BIFF Response® can be applied in any communication anywhere: in an email, a text message, on social media, or in a letter. It can be used at work, earning you respect and success. It can help you get along with difficult family members, friends, neighbors, and others anywhere in your life.
BIFF was designed to protect you and your reputation by responding quickly and civilly to people who treat you rudely while being reasonable in return. BIFF stands for Brief, Informative, Friendly, and Firm. A BIFF response is easy to remember, but hard to do. It takes practice! This first book in the Conflict Communication Series is for anyone dealing with high conflict written communications. Complete with instructions in the four-step BIFF method, and numerous practical examples, readers will learn the intricacies of stopping the back-and-forth messages and ultimately contain the conflict. (If you need to use BIFF with a co-parent, BIFF for CoParent Communication is just for you! And BIFF at Work is perfect for workplace communication.)
This Second Edition includes a new chapter on Coaching for BIFF Responses. Anyone can use this coaching method to help someone else with a BIFF communication by asking 10 simple questions to make it even more effective.
Then learn the EAR Statement™ technique in Calming Upset People with EAR for communicating in person (verbally) in high-conflict situations or with any upset person. An EAR Statement can calm an angry or upset person in seconds!
Chapter One High-Conflict People and Blamespeak
Chapter Two Writing a BIFF Response
Chapter Three Avoid Admonishments, Advice and Apologies
Chapter Four BIFFs for Friends and Family (and Ex’s)
Chapter Five Neighbors
Chapter Six In the Workplace
Chapter Seven Business and Professions
Chapter Eight Organizations and Governments
Chapter Nine Politicians
Chapter Ten Coaching for BIFF Responses
Chapter Eleven You Decide...
References About the Author
REHANA JAMAL is a conflict resolution specialist, mediator, and lawyer. She has always been fascinated by the way in which people interact, particularly in the way they communicate and navigate difficult conversations. This led her to pursue an undergraduate degree in psychology and, thereafter, a career in law and conflict resolution. Part of her work is to create and implement conflict resolution programs in schools and help reimagine a world where communities integrate conflict resolution as a guiding principle. Rehana holds an LL.M. in dispute resolution from Pepperdine Law School, a J.D. from Cardozo School of Law, and is a member of the New York State Bar. Her B.A. is in psychology from Barnard College, Columbia University. She has tremendous experience and passion working with people from different cultural, sociopolitical, and economic backgrounds.
"I used Bill Eddy to deal with a very difficult personnel situation. I implemented his advice. Instead of pursuing endless, frustrating conflict and confrontation, I adopted an entirely different approach, with excellent results. Bill gave me a pathway when I thought all roads were blocked." Dan Solin, author of the Smartest series of books
"I used Bill Eddy to deal with a very difficult personnel situation. I implemented his advice. Instead of pursuing endless, frustrating conflict and confrontation, I adopted an entirely different approach, with excellent results. Bill gave me a pathway when I thought all roads were blocked." — Dan Solin, author of the Smartest series of books