Achievement almost killed him. Fulfillment saved him.
Grant Muller was nearly killing himself – quite literally. A
desperate quest to get rich had made him a millionaire before the age of 30 but
then taken him to the brink: homeless, living on drugs and hustle. If his
lifestyle didn’t end him, one of the thugs he owed money to would surely do the
job.
So when he finally got off the streets and got clean, he knew
everything had to change. He reinvented himself, and along the way came to
understand that real success in sales isn’t just about the hustle, about being
top of mind. It’s about the human connections you create.
In transforming his own life, he transformed his understanding
of business. Today he earns his millions as a real estate agent, living and
working with a ‘Top of Heart’ philosophy, the true source of authentic
connection, fulfillment and success. His remarkable story is a call to a new,
more human approach to business that might just save YOUR life, too.
‘Real-world urgency… A must read.’ Robert Reffkin, Founder &
CEO, Compass Real Estate
Prologue:Fast action scene. On drugs and up for days, I wake up behind the wheel of a car, on a perilous and steep mountain highway. I introduce the reader to my drug addiction and my current state of affairs as a drug middleman. I owe money to a very bad person and I don’t have enough drugs left (because I did them) to make enough money to pay him back. Introduction: The chapter opens with a networking meeting that is going very badly for me. I am treating people like numbers, and having poor results. After this illustration, I introduce the concepts of Top of Mind and then explain why Top of Mind isn’t enough - I introduce Top of Heart as the next step in our evolution. I explain that getting “real” saved my life, and I invite the reader to get real to save their business. Part I: Me Chapter 1: Where Have All the Cowboys Gone? This chapter opens as I am 7 yrs old on the plane flight to relocate from South Africa to the US. There is an emergency landing. As we settle in the US, I have trouble connecting with the other students. I am clearly different from them with my funny accent, and other differences become evident. This chapter runs through about 12 years old. The chapter ends as I finally find a place to belong - with the horses. Chapter 2: In the Middle In middle school, I meet someone and we explore cigarettes and alcohol together. I am not conscious of it, but I develop a crush on him. As the chapter continues, my addictions grow as I try harder and harder to hide the fact that I’m gay from myself as much as from others. Toward the end of the chapter, the denial is gone, but I am far from self acceptance. I get an opportunity to apprentice with an Olympic rider in Canada. Chapter 3: Churn and Burn This chapter covers my early professional live from apprentice, to professional horse trainer, to Arby’s assistant manager to stock brokery stock at a disreputable penny stock firm. Chapter 4: Cultures and Vultures I leave the penny stock firm and take a jo with Charles Schwab. I work very hard (partly because I want to avoid the fact that I don’t fit in once again). I am promoted quickly and rise through the ranks. I reach senior manager level and then there is a regime change. I see the writing on the wall and take a position with an internet firm. Part II: Dying of Achievement Chapter 5: Boom! I take a director level position at the internet firm and work hard to build a sales team. We go public and we are all rich. One problem - I don’t enjoy the work. unfulfilled, I start taking weekend trips and end up experimenting with drugs. By the end of the chapter I have developed a cocaine addiction. Chapter 6: Bust My Cocaine addiction grows. I’m oblivious and in denial but it’s strangling me. I lose my job at the internet start up. I become more and more paranoid and lost more and more of my personal functionality. Life is turning from endless party to darkness and depravity. Chapter 7: Circling the Drain I instantly lose $1,070,00-0 worth of stock options. Still in denial, I sell the bmw to buy more cocaine. I’m introduced to meth. I’m evicted from my condo. I try working for a phone company but quite after getting high with the first pay check. I start selling drugs to pay for my habit. I start to lose my grip on reality. I become homeless. Chapter 8: Scraping Bottom I take up residence in a drug dealer’s apartment. I develop a growing list of customers. My increasing paranoia makes it nearly impossible to complete deals. I get held at gunpoint for the first time. My drug debts starting piling up. I get held up and robbed for a second time. Stuck on the streets with nowhere to go, I give up and call home to Mom. Chapter 9: Saving My Own Ass I sleep at mom’s house for a few days. She takes me to Denver to turn myself into the probation officer. I run again and start using and selling again. I disappear. I hook up with a very violent big time dealer and sell for him. The deals go awry and I end up owing this very bad man a lot of money. I hide from him in a crack house. Finally, I give up and turn myself in. This time I go to jail first, and then to rehab. Chapter 10: De Ja Vu - Triggers I take the reader through a present-day trip through Denver, juxtaposing my present day life with the nightmare life I lived before. I touch on homelessness, desperate addiction, a life of crime vs my present-day love and beauty and joy. This chapter teaches that change is always possible. Part III: Fulfillment Chapter 11: Top of Mind Finally clean and sober, I get my first job at a call center. My criminal record prevents me from a promotion. I get a job as a server, dreaming of becoming a realtor. I introduce “Top of Mind” as a marketing concept. Of all the brands a consumer can choose from, which ones are top of mind. I tell some stories to illustrate the concept. Meanwhile, as I learn these concepts to become a realtor, I’m in the early days of my recovery, still on required ua’s and going to 12 step meetings. Chapter 12: Fear & Scarcity In my early days as a realtor, I invest in coaching. I try online lead generation and radio ads. They don’t work well. I want to build a relationship business but I am not comfortable with who I am. I realize I must get real in business, like I have had to do in recovery, if I am going to make it. Chapter 13: Get Real I experience euphoric recall and I am tempted to relapse. I get real in the 12-step meeting that night - I spill the beans and get vulnerable. I face the ugly truth about who I have been. I start to feel lighter. I start to feel like a human again. I start to connect with who I really am. Chapter 14: Lightning Strikes After finally getting real in the meeting and in my recovery, I return to the real estate office. Suddenly, the fake tactics start to feel so wrong. Have I come all this way to get real, only to be forced to be a fake at work in order to “make it”? I’m face with an impossible dilemma. In the middle of the night, I wake up and devise a new plan - what if I am just real? What if I just have true, meaningful emotional connections with people and go from top of mind to top of heart?! Chapter 15: What is Top of Heart? I introduce the Top of Heart Framework. I begin by reviewing the top of mind framework - know - like - trust. Then I introduce the Top of heart framework Head (mindset) - Hands (skillset) - Heart (Heartset). I give examples of each. Part IV: Heads, Hands & Heart Chapter 16: Head (Mindset) I explore the mindset of approaching others from a human perspective rather than a sales perspective. I discuss shedding the professional persona that so many of us hide behind. I discuss bringing all of ourselves to work. The mindset is about authenticity and embracing the strengths that come from our differences. Chapter 17: Hands (Skillset) We look at skillset vs affirmations and true confidence vs bluster. I discuss the 3 key pieces of skillset - Strength, Excellence, and Personal Impact. Chapter 18: Heart (Heartset) Themes of heartset are wellness, truth, and connection. I tell the story of connecting deeply with a client. I share that I was hesitant at first to truly show up, but when I did, so much human beauty emerged. This is the power of lasting, emotional relationships. I introduced my 3 step framework for a new heartset - Getting Curious, Getting Intentional, Getting Aligned. Conclusion: Simpatico I discuss achievement vs fulfillment and true belonging Epilogue: Going Viral I frame the story of the book in the context of a modern day pandemic. I look back on this past life with a new personality and perspective.